War
For this Hashem created the universe?
Yes
What if I’m a pacifist?
Apikoros
How much do I have to invest in this?
All you’ve got
Then why did Hashem give it to me?
To be returned
What does that leave for me?
Who are you
Rosh Chodesh Elul
Means what to you?
The Ramchal writes, “כל אחד יכין עצמו לתשובה“.
Torah Vav starts with, “…כי צריך כל אדם“.
Roshei tevos of both selections are each gematria ענוה.
The crown we’re hoping to coronate Hashem with on Rosh Hashana
Is the crown of all midos.
ענוה
Be a man
Devise a plan
An Elul proletarian
The Worst Night In History
Was in chodesh Av
The month of שמיעה
בכיה של חנם
Triggered by לשון הרע
We’re obligated to verbally acknowledge
Loshon hora toxicity
Daily
Would make sense
To focus on the Meraglim event
Not מעשה מרים
Meraglim was a national disaster
Miriam an individual’s mistake
Message In A Bottle
Abba’s found new love
Varies in shape and size
Mommy upped and ran away
Repulsed by blood red eyes
Abba, why you sleeping?
We hope you’re still a dreamer
Once upon a time
Your eyes were wide
The galaxy your oyster
Abba’s found new love
Forbidden by Hashem
Soon we’ll up and run away
Away from Abba’s friend
Firearms
Come out to the gun show
As seen in Guns and Ammo
Gotta do your hishtadlus
In perilous Orlando
The lakes are snakes and gators
The rednecks all Jew haters
God bless the hairy arms of Esav
The only defense that you can think of
The womenfolk are soft and pray
Like old man Jacob
Back in the day
Tu B’Av
Is when we Jews develop self-confidence
Enabling us to feel Hashem’s exclusive love
See the Rambam at the end of Mesechta Taanis
And celebrate!
Good Yom Tov
Avoda Of The Week…
Birchas HaMazon!
Unlike brocho rishona
Bentching is the blessing of gratitude
Someone who isn’t verbally grateful is not a mentch
One who isn’t grateful isn’t a human being
Best to bentch twice a day
Once in the morning
And again in the evening
Each of the four brochos correspond to the letters of Havaya
The five sections corrrespond to the five partzufim and tzaddikim
ps Kavana in bentching is a powerful segula for parnosa
Hashem repays gratitude handsomely
Shabbos Nachamu
Is the opportunity of the year
Designed for us
To be מנחם each other
נחמו נחמו עם יוד
Five chapters of Eicha
Begin with five mentions of מנחם
Moshiach’s first name
Every סתירה is על מנת לבנות
Build your friends and family
Redeem them
With Simcha
באי בשלום עטרת בעלה
גם בשמחה ובצהלה
Shabbos Nachamu Shalom
What Hope Is There For A Jew Stuck In Vegas?
None
Except for the local mikveh
Stay submerged amap until unstuck
So too a Jew’s neshama
Stuck in an oasis of tumah
Surrounded by אין סוף
Hopeless
Without the local mikveh
What’s yours?
As A Young Man
The Chidushei HaRim was asked by a senior tzaddik
R’ Shlomo Leib of Lentcha
“We’re expected to serve Hashem even if he takes our life
ובכל נפשך
But not if he takes our heart
בכל לבבך should teach us that
But it doesn’t
Instead
בכל לבבך teaches we serve Hashem with our both yetzers, hara and hatov
They’re not our heart anyway
Just act upon our heart
The Chiduushei HaRim didn’t answer
He bemoaned that silence for the rest of his life
Why was he silent?
Why did he regret it?
How would you answer the tzaddik’s question?